Truth from Dare: Love and marriage

Nov. 7, 2013 | 5 Comments

Pearl City resident Anthony Serna waves a sign in support of the same-sex marriage bill in front of the Hawaii State Capitol on Wednesday, Nov. 6. (Star-Advertiser photo by Krystle Marcellus)

Pearl City resident Anthony Serna waves a sign in support of the same-sex marriage bill in front of the Hawaii State Capitol on Wednesday, Nov. 6. (Star-Advertiser photo by Krystle Marcellus)

BY DERIN DEREGO / Special to the Star-Advertiser

If you’re a regular reader of this blog, you know that once in while I like to get a little political. After all, life can’t always be about parties and pageantry. While I try to keep my soapbox tucked away, sometimes certain social issues tug on my psyche. The current debate on marriage equality in our state is one such issue.

I find it profoundly disturbing that opponents of same-sex marriage feel so strongly about the issue. How something that’s between people you don’t even know can bother you so much you would protest their happiness is beyond me. Professing hate under the guise of protecting the institution of marriage is cowardly and pathetic.

And shame on State of Hawaii Police Officers Union president Tenari Maafala for saying he would rather die than uphold a law that recognizes same-sex marriage. Everyone is entitled to their own beliefs, but when you work for the government and your job is to uphold the law, you can’t let those beliefs interfere with the job you were hired to do.

Cyryna Pasion runs down S. Beretania St. during rush hour traffic in support of  the same-sex marriage bill on Wednesday, Nov. 6. (Star-Advertiser photo by Krystle Marcellus)

Cyryna Pasion runs down S. Beretania St. during rush hour traffic in support of the same-sex marriage bill on Wednesday, Nov. 6. (Star-Advertiser photo by Krystle Marcellus)

The bottom line is, you can’t use a religious argument about the sanctity of marriage to prevent giving equal rights to citizens of a country that stands on, among other things, a pillar of the separation of church and state. Period.

And those opposed to equal rights and calling for putting the issue to a public vote as a stall tactic are foolishly standing on the wrong side of progress. In hindsight, they’ll also be standing on the wrong side of history along with those who resisted the abolishment of slavery or women’s suffrage.

Get it together people. You look ridiculous.

Personally, I can’t wait to pop a bottle of bubbly when Senate Bill 1 passes. I don’t know if I’ll ever get married, but I do think anyone who wants to should be able to.
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When he’s not out and about at the hottest parties and other events in Honolulu, Derin “Dare” Derego works as an account executive at a local radio station group. Reach him via email at derinderego@yahoo.com or follow him on Twitter.

  • Kevin S. Oshiro

    i support separation of church and state…

    • emt22

      strangely enough, so did the founding fathers of this country. thus, they placed a premium on making sure that religious freedom was not abridged in any form by the state (crown). a bill that affords flimsy or no protection to religious clergy and non-profit religious groups would force them to either accede to demands that does not comport with their religious beliefs, or face state-based criminal charges. somewhat ironic that the founding fathers, the descendants of a group of individuals that initially fled England due to similar assaults on their religious freedom, would be invoked today to take away those very freedoms. history has truly come full circle.

  • Reggie Chappelle

    While I understand the supporters of SSM saying its all about happiness, shouldn’t matter who we love, etc. I think your column makes too many generalized statements. First, to say that those opposed “hate” SSM is making an assumption – they just don’t agree with it. Just because someone disagrees with you on (in this case) a lifestyle doesn’t mean they hate you. If you’ve listened to most of the opposer’s testimonies, you’d recognize that its not the person they hate, its the sin or the act (just like Jesus loved the sinners but hated sin in the Bible). 2. While I agree that this nation was founded on the pursuit of equal rights for everyone, let’s not forget that it was also founded under christian beliefs. I mean, God is in our nation’s foundations (i.e. our money, pledge of allegiance, etc.) Or have we just turned a blind eye on that? 3. Comparing SSM to slavery is apples & oranges.

    I think that you might be caught up in the moment of now, but try to think of the future and what this bill/law would entail. Its not just about two gay/lesbian couples who just want to get married. It goes more than that. It opens up pandora’s box of who/what is considered “marriage”.

    • Derinderego

      1. I was saying they are preaching hate, not that they hate SSM
      1b. My life is not a style. Is your heterosexuality at style?
      2. America may have been united by Christians initially (you can’t found something that others already were occupying)…. but there’s a foundation that separates church and state meaning religious beliefs can’t make their way into public policy.
      3.Hate is hate. Intolerance is intolerance. You can’t say “i love you. respect you. but sit over there.” In both instances one group is telling another they are Less Than.

      • Reggie Chappelle

        1. Not sure exactly what you mean by “preaching hate”. Hate towards proponents? The only “hate” that’s being “preached” is the act. “Hate the sin, not the sinner.” No one is hating on a person or group.

        2. You’re absolutely correct. Your life is not a style nor is my heterosexuality. However, “life” & “style” are two totally different meanings. You’re trying to take a word & spin it into something totally different other than what it really means. Look up the word “lifestyle” and its definition.

        3. that foundation you’re speaking of still has “God” in it. If our forefathers intended to separate church & state, why did they leave “God” in it? There must’ve been a reason why they put it there.

        4. No one is saying one is less than another. if you want me to take what you say literally, you can definitely tell someone “i love you. respect you. but sit over there.” Isn’t that how we punish kids sometimes? That’s not fair of me to say that, is it?